Revisit: “I’m Exhausted – And I’m Not Stopping” (July 2016)

Original Post

The summer of 2016 saw a very mentally, and slightly less physically, exhausted Anthony. Everything from school to the Presidential Election was wearing on my patience and good moods.

Fast-forward to the late summer of 2020. I am very mentally, very emotionally, and slightly less physically, exhausted. I want to look back and compare some of the moments of ’16 with the ridiculous summer year of ’20.

July 2016 vs. Summer 2020

I’m exhausted by the constant “Mights” and “Maybes” happening throughout you: ‘there “might” be work this week’, ‘[friend/friends] “might” be at [insert event] tomorrow’, ‘”maybe” I’ll do this this or that, depending on money or transportation’. I’m too tired to decipher “mights” and “maybes” any more, and I’m tired of using them myself. A “maybe” or “might” is a “no”, unless there is a reason – a very good reason – given for it, and not one given at the last minute.
Money and work hours are a world away from the levels of 2016, for the better. However, COVID-19 has put 99% of the hopes of hanging with friends and family back to the ’16 levels: almost non-existent. Not even, to echo a friend’s FB post from earlier, “a chance to hook up, and I even have the house to myself” (there wasn’t much chance of that happening to me, even pre-Covid, BUT STILL).

I’m exhausted by your U.S. Presidential Race cycle:
I am 40 shades of exhausted from the avalanche of ignorance coming from Donald Trump and his more vocal supporters.
I’m exhausted from hearing and reading all of the constant whining from the Millennial supporters of Bernie Sanders. 

I didn’t think that the 2020 Election, back in March, would be as irritating and exhausting as 2016.
Not only have some of the Trump worshipers crawled out of the woodwork, they have become increasingly vocal, nasty, and delusional on Facebook (I don’t dare look at Twitter). A lot of them are also the same ones that have bragged about not wearing masks, whined about having to wear masks, and treat COVID-19 as “just like the flu”.

I’m exhausted from seeing stories about police officers being shot.

I’m exhausted from seeing story after story, article after article, about Black men being shot by police. 

I’m exhausted from trying to explain that “Stop shooting Black Men and profiling Middle Easterners, Police!” does not equal “I hate the police!”. 
I still don’t like seeing cops getting shot. I never will like seeing or hearing about that. However, I am completely done with cops shooting unarmed Black men... and I am tired of people defending it. I am tired of seeing and hearing “All Lives Matter”. I am tired of seeing “Blue Lives Matter.” Let me say it again: we aren’t saying that OTHER LIVES DON’T MATTER. We are saying that OUR LIVES MATTER, ALSO. If you cannot understand that by now (or refuse to acknowledge that), then you are part of the problem. Unfollow me, unfriend me, if you wish/must, but don’t try to explain to me about ‘Blue Lives’ or ‘All Lives’ – your opinions no longer matter.

I cannot accurately describe how exhausting it is to try and time buses to get around town.
Let me save a couple of the Facebook readers from chiming in: I will get a vehicle when I can afford to get a vehicle. The exhausting part is getting around town, per se: it’s the timing of buses that sucks. You know what has strangely helped with this? Covid-19. With so much stuff shut down, and so few people hanging out in person, TARC (the bus system for Louisville) cut some of their service routes and re-arranged a lot of Downtown buses’ routes. This resulted in me basically catching one route (2x a day) around town. It’s still a pain to get around but at least I’m only going to 2 or 3 places on the bus now?

There are/were no Olympics to distract me, like in 2016, but there is NBA, NHL, and even some baseball. There has also been the Indy 500, the Kentucky Oaks, the Kentucky Derby , and (on Sunday) the NHRA U.S. Nationals.

Thankfully, there is no job search or lack of job hours.

Reading and music have helped in the relaxation department. So have “games that were on the shelf”, such as Pillars of Eternity, Doom 3 (yeah, the 2004 PC version), and Okami.

Team Trivia Nights and Game Nights are gone, but ‘Saturday Morning D&D on Zoom’ is now there.

I’ll echo what I said in 2016: “I will not give up a positive outlook, no matter how gray things appear…. if and when I can, I will continue to try to put a smile on someone’s face, make them a chuckle or laugh, or make them feel better than they did. ” However, I need to also remember to recharge when needed.

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